Quotations From Solid Stone

Or, "My Life Behind A Bumper Sticker"

If kids can be made to go to school
then schools can be made safe for the kids at school

Rule For Success #1
You can win without being nice
But you can't be nice without winning.

**

BLACK
is the most beautiful color in the rainbow

*

These Truths We Hope
Are Self-Evident

© 2010 by Tale Wins
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
For Lin Stone

***

The only things worth doing
are impossible.

***

Compromise is where
you agree to take one step back and
they agree to take two steps forward.

***

The best thing you can do for the economy is quit being one of the poor people that can't do a thing about it.

***

Anything you do twice should only have to be redone once. 

**

When you save time you make money.

**

Failure usually happens about the time you decide to quit slowing down for the curves. ~ Lin Stone

**

The only thing that counts in this life is what you do after you can do no more.

**

Theories have a habit of falling apart when history uses them for punching bags.

***

Obedience to the law is the price of freedom. 

**

The Little Things in life are bigger than they look.

***

Remember this smoking hot political advice for success seeping upward from Washington corridors:

Keep your eyes peeled
 your chin up
  your nose down
   your back braced
    your neck bowed
     your nose to the grindstone
      your foot on the brake
       your elbow in the grease
        and your finger in the till.

~ Lin Stone

***

Art isn’t art just because the artist died penniless; nor is it art just because some “expert” has declared it to be good — or bad. Expert Opinions come and go, rise and fall, dry up and fall apart with the fickles of fate. The common man knows that just because art is old doesn’t mean it’s gold.  The common woman knows that the only real test of art comes from hanging it in the kitchen; if it evokes a feeling that helps you roll out better biscuits -- then it’s art.

***

Don't pet the sweaty things.

***

One of the best blessings Heavenly Father gave us was room for improvement.

***
The older I get the less I accomplish; seems like life gets in the way

**

Like it or not, poverty is usually a self-inflicted wound, and most of us are using shot guns to do it.

**

Liberals struggle forever with this insane desire to be known as wonderful people.  While I admire their ambition I still wish they'd quit stealing my money to finance their good intentions.

**

You can believe this or not, if you don't want to.

***

The general that chases two armies catches hell.

***

Man searches for facts to substantiate what he told his neighbors last week.

***

With the right facts you can make a better decision than anyone that won't look at the facts.

**

No plan ever goes exactly right but if you don't plan ahead then you won't know what to do when nothing goes right.

***

Anything we have will always be more useful than every thing we haven't and there is a corollary to that as well.. anything we need will always cost more than anything we want.

***

I have found it to be universally true that there are only three kinds of lucky people in the world; them that don't know it can't be done, them that know it can, and them that reads the instructions first.

***

Hate always comes first; the excuse comes next, somewhere down the line

***.

As a young man I was determined to be rich.  Therefore I went out searching for gold, silver and lead.  I found mica instead and I found almost enough of it to rub my nose in.

** 

Happiness is the brightest condition of those who are beautiful.  It works the other way too.  Be happy, if you want to be beautiful.

***

The future is uncertain, but you can certainly plan ahead for most of the things that ruin most of the people around you.

***

I don't like being stupid, but sometimes it is forced upon me.

***

Over in Iraq, most accidents in an intersection happen when 2 drivers are aiming for the same tourist; The excuse is, they just want Americans to feel at home.

**

This house is crowded so full that we don't have room for junk any more.

There is a place, nobody knows where,
but everyone knows that the bread also rises there.

***

Give yourself a real lift.

***

Our American dollar bills were once known as PAPER MONEY and everybody laughed when they got some.  Now they are  known as funny money, and nobody is laughing.

Before Franklin D. Roosevelt introduced the 1935 series, our one dollar bills were worth real money because they were backed up three ways:

  1. by gold,

  2. by silver

  3. and by copper. 

Today our funny looking little one dollar bills are backed up only by accident.

***

If inflation gets any worse the cops caught stealing apples will be facing Grand Larceny charges.  ~ Lin Stone

***

America has nothing to fear except one more Democrat in Washington.

***

No road is long when shared with a friend driving a Jeep.

***

My cane has 4 tips for more traction so we have christened it Mock-4.

***

Kites that decide to follow the wind are soon plunged on a collision course with disaster.

***

Having Courage has little to do with being Stupid.

***

If I will just listen to someone long enough they are sure to confess.

***

All I ever wanted out of life was to change the whole world so everyone thought I was wonderful.

***

I shut up. I listen. I try to laugh in all the right places; no wonder I'm so successful.

***

Any time you hear a chortled chuckle and the words, "My doctor won't let me do THAT." you can know of a surety you are listening to a damn fool.

***

When I was young I wanted to know I could survive without weapons all alone in the wilderness.  Now that I'm old I want to know that I can survive without weapons, all alone as a patient in a hospital.

***

The one thing that makes any job easier is knowing where to start.  If you have that gift then you can turn a pitiful handful of midwits (capable of producing only mediocre results) into an army of first class generals that think they are doing it all on their own.

***

Sometimes if it wasn't for the magical powers of procrastination I couldn't make it through the whole day without working.

***

Trusting in Government progress will not stop a molehill from getting too big to handle.

***

That's a hot potato no matter how you mash it.

**

The only shortcut to success
is doing it right the first time.

***

Always Pick Up Your Change

***

Optimists that are seldom right about anything
are happier than pessimists
that are never wrong about anything.

***

The mouth of man can acquire a taste for just about anything, but it is hard to compete with the taste of old memories.

***

Here is the greatest truth known to man of maintaining solid, financial health: You either set money aside before the lean years come, or you will hock your soul to the devil when they arrive.

***

I go down any road until I hit a stop sign or get shot at.

***

If you don't starve yourself to death every once in a
while you'll never start eating what's good for you.
That's my theory! And you are welcome to it.

***

I can keep my priorities straight without any problem at all.  It's those little, inefficient, non-effective habits that keep me spinning in my tracks.

***

There are convicts in prisons that other hands built for them so well they can't get away.  Working so hard you forget you have a family is a prison you build for yourself, and after a while you can't get away.  If you keep building you will find yourself in spirit prison and there is NO escape from there until the end of eternity.

***

The only thing spiritual that was ever settled by debate was "How many angels can dance on the head of a pin."  And, I don't remember what number was finally decided on in that debate.

***

Hitler stayed in office by killing anyone that said he was wrong.  Finally, there was only one bullet left.

***

Setting goals is for people who need to be whipped to get enough get up to go.

***

I'm probably the only man in America that got traded in for a stray cat.

***

Hush you huskies.  Hush!

***

Okay buddy, you just tell me where I was headed when I interrupted you -- and I'm out of here.

***

When you go home from a stroke you can expect one of two reactions from any of your family or friends...
One is: Let's put him in a cradle so we can rock him to sleep if he stirs..
and the other is: He hasn't stumbled in the last ten minutes so let's give him a short pole and see if he can balance a live alligator on his shoulders while crossing over Niagara Falls on a tightrope.
Friends from either extreme can get you killed, but if all my other choices are limited to these 2 then I prefer to try earning my place among the latter bunch.

***

The only thing certain
about the laws of probability
is that they really do work --
about nine times out of ten.

***

Just take a little bit to see if you like it a whole lot.

***

When you want to be heard, you have got to speak up. The only way to get a better deal is to ask for it. One gets what one wants based solely on the ability to persuade others, and that takes negotiation, not luck.

***

I have endured every temptation on earth except adulation.  I am praying that temptation will come next.

***

You can't call yourself a real politician until you can charm the skin off a blind rattle snake.

***

Let's face facts here. 
#1, you're going to be wrong sometimes. 
#2, Even when you are 100% right,
Cutting you down to their size
will make some people feel taller.

***

Knowing what you are doing wrong is almost as good as knowing what you should be doing right.

***

It isn't until the body realizes it has a brain that it becomes capable of reaching some of its true potentials.

***

Travel stories have always been popular because travel writers instinctively know that telling the truth does not pay well.

***

Of course there are easy answers to every question. 
The problem is:

answers are seldom the solution.

***

I would have been a thousand miles farther on down this road if I had just been smart enough to skip the short cuts some of my so-called friends told me about.

***

It is impossible to give a grain of truth to anyone possessing a ton of knowledge.

***

The Lord has resisted so many temptations to make me rich that I can only conclude he's doing it on purpose.

***

I've known Tale Wins through many years of thick and thin.  I've known Tale Wins when he was rich; I've known Tale Wins when he was poor: Rich is better.

For use in your speeches, substitute your name for Tale Wins.

***

You know you have joined the ranks of the world's wealthy when you start throwing food away just because it is rotten.

***

The best thing Bill Clinton did for America was prove that the media was not, and is not, public opinion incarnate.  In those early days of his run for the Presidency, after the press had built him up as big as they were going to and when they did their best to shove him aside, Bill Clinton smiled indulgently and proved indisputably you could ignore the media and still be elected President.

***

Dan Quayle's sojourn in national politics proves just how vicious and relentless the media can be.

**

There comes a time in every man's life when just being able to soak up some sunlight seems like a major accomplishment.

***

The Key to a Healthy Life is to:
Exercise Regularly and Take Long Vacations

***

The only time a man is willing to accept something less is before he gets it.

***

We can't be brave until we know what we are running away from.

***

A wise man never tries to pretend
he is any smarter than I think he is.

***


Great Brains are of little use
When Brute Force is already knocking on the door.

***

One Man With A Tank is a majority.

***

He who hesitates for a minute
is lost for an hour.

***

I'm old now, with bones that won't bend and medical needs that won't wait.

***

Ten seconds of anger can pack thirty years of sorrow into your life.

***

Preparation is the primary principle of Participation.

***

There is a time to be big, and a time to belittle.

***

***

Out of the last 1016 times that I had a 50/50 chance of getting it right, I got it wrong 1016 times!  Is anyone else keeping score out there?

***

It takes me so long to get it right that I remember it wrong."

**

When there are only two choices, right or wrong, I usually get it wrong four times in a row, sometimes more. But, if I ever do get it right, you won't shake me off it no matter how many other choices you give me.

***

If exercising is so great why did all them athletes retire at 30 when I could keep working until I was 75?

I wouldn't let a cat be treated at that hospital,
much less a dog.

***

As an ally against the sea of bitterness I was swimming through, he was a good millstone to put around my neck.

***

I invite you to join me in the next frame.

If you think I'm driving slow now, just you wait until we get to the next stop sign.

**

When I heard of your dire straits I was pierced to the purse -- and all the way to the purse.

***

The only thing worse than being criticized is finding out nobody cared enough to correct me

***

The happiest man alive is the one that can forgive everyone he hates.

**

What goes around, turns around.

***

Most people find themselves running away from a little stream of pain instead of rushing towards a sea of happiness.

***

There is a fine difference between being anxiously engaged in a good cause and anxiously running around in circles.

***

There are only a few ways to do missionary work wrong.

***

We become much braver in doing what we want to when nobody is watching.

*** 

It is better to make a little effort now than to brag about something big you are going to do.

***

Any time you give up on someone you give them an excuse for quitting.

***

The only way to get ahead is to do the things you need to do before you need to. 

***

I won't take orders from anyone,
not even myself.

***

People were not made to be satisfied.

***

My jokes are even funnier,
after you understand them.

***

Not only do our troops deserve
our wholehearted support,
our national survival depends on it.

The most dangerous place on earth is between a fool and his fury.

***

When an accident happens
it is already too late to be planning ahead.

***

If "We The People" are to survive we must learn to be proud of our "average" students.  Earning that tag proves they are politically correct only half of the time.

***

Henry Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson met by chance one night and just by chance both men recorded their views of the encounter.  Emerson complained that Thoreau would raise an objection to every statement he made, even the most trivial subjects were contested.  Thoreau recorded that Emerson couldn't make even the most trivial of statements without automatically assuming it was already being contested, or soon would be.  I know exactly how they felt; I've had nights just like that, and there was nobody here but me.

***

Sure, I'm paranoid;  I'm suspicious of anyone sneaking up behind me.

***

The only thing more dangerous than a psychiatrist is an M.D. that thinks psychiatry is so simple s/he can understand it well enough to practice without a license.  Doc, even psychiatrists aren't smart enough to practice psychiatry after they get a license to teach psychiatry.

***

Let the political squirmishes begin.

***

The "Yawl Come" immigration policy began shutting down when 95% of the Native American population had been killed off.  The great White Father in Washington decided that income tax could do the rest of us in without him needing professional help.

***

The fastest way out of an argument is to pretend the other kettle is too black to handle, and refuse to get your hands any dirtier.

***

***

The good news is inflation's only a little worse than yesterday, but the bad news is, it is MUCH worse than last week.

***

The only bad thing about being retired is that if I don't keep working we can't afford it.

***

I feel like a failure and I feel like a fool.  With a combination like that you discover a drastic new adjustment happening to your perspective.

***

If we didn't have all these problems to solve
we'd never get good enough to face what's coming up next.

Only by increasing the light
can we part the darkened night
and see the shadows more clear.
As we use the light
to inch along our stall
we see the shadows turn,
into the writing on the wall.

People will usually settle for advice, but what they really want is somebody to fix their problems for free.

***

Those endowed with true greatness will admit they are wrong when I share my opinions with them.

***

When I was a young lad I came to the conclusion that anyone that suggested my daddy was wrong about something deserved a medal for raw courage.  He may be dead and in his grave now, but I am not brave enough to change that opinion yet.

***

This little Wal*Mart is bigger than the town I grew up in.

***

Pictures are windows that let others look at our dreams.

***

I invite you to join me in the next frame.

If your career turns to ashes it will be
because you failed to fan the flames.

"Besides only being worth two cents,
the BIG problem

with the one dollar bill is
that you can't spend it twice." 

***

It is better to shake your hand twice
than it is to miss your hand once.

***

Unless God is real the Bible isn't even a good fairy tale.

***

If you can't stand to spend three hours in church once a week why would you want to spend an eternity in heaven with his kind of people? 

***

You will learn more in one day by working for a boss that's paying you too much than you will by paying a college what it thinks a year of its empty space is worth.

***

How can we trust these guys running around screaming the sky will fill up with hot air a century from now when their kind can't even get tomorrow's weather right?

***

You don't get better by whining.
There's some law against it.

***

Every day in my life is a new day of Thanksgiving

***

I have a great attitude.  In fact, if I didn't know I was going broke I wouldn't even suspect I had a problem in the world.

***

"Nobody trying to live a righteous life will ever be bored."

***

If US won't work together
Then US won't work at all.

***

If you can't make it worse by whining then there is no use trying anything else.

***

There is no sin in someone thinking they are better than you. 

No law can prevent that. 

The sin is in you helping them prove it is true.

***

Evil things happen any time they get a chance, but it requires a whole stream of heroic efforts to turn out good.

***

Of course our young men are brave enough for battle.
Just think how much courage it must take to wear those baggy pants in public.

***

Was hell digged for rabbits, or designed for men who rage like wolves?

***

I can't go on. 
But of course I do. 

***

The only stock in trade our young novelists have is the recording of how easily they were impressed. It is best to remember they may have picked their best stories up from a convicted liar instead of stealing anecdotes out of a politician's pocket like the rest of us do.

***

Make Congress send out goats for foreign aid and you'll kill political kickback.  Think about it, if you were really starving would you prefer seeing the governor of your country burn a bunch of dollars like they were toast , or would you rather have a goat of your own to roast? 

***

She's a liar.  I have NEVER said anything like that -- to her face!

I invite you to join me in the next frame.

Click on ANY type of Insurance
and learn how to save more money
or to find the company of your choice!

Anything worth saving your money for
is worth buying now.

Please think of this as your home while you are staying with us.  And if you can find anything here worth stealing, please share it with us.

***

Young Christians look forward to the day they will have a huge mansion in heaven.
Older Christians realize they would vastly prefer a little maintenance-free apartment up there.

***

Some people can never feel superior until they find someone to look down upon.

***

I have a good mind to pick up this baseball bat and work you over, with your permission, of course.

***

It's not what you eat occasionally that kills you; It's sticking to the diet they insist is good for you.

***

Until you win the Battle of the Buck
you'll be a victim of the dollar.

***

I invite you to join me in the next frame.

God has already been kicked out of our schools.  God has already been kicked out of our courtrooms.  If you don't quit feeling guilty about voting your conscience He'll be kicked off the ballot too.

***

I am going to prove you are innocent by trying my best to convict you.

***

It isn't enough to know WHAT to pack for your trip, You have to know HOW to pack it so you can find it when you need it.

***

Heritage is the history we accept as examples of the principles we want our children to live by.

***

Education is being able to repeat what someone else has said about the subject.  Brilliance is being able to make sense of what's been said.  Genius is being able to prove you thought of it first and said it better anyway.

***

You can only kick a dog nineteen times before he turns around and bites back.  I'm a man though, and you can only kick me once.

**

I invite you to join me in the next frame.

Remember this political advice for success coming from Washington corridors:
Keep your eyes peeled
your chin up
your nose down
your back braced
your neck bowed
your nose to the grindstone
your foot on the brake
your elbow in the grease
and your finger in the till.

***

We can't dry up the rivers of iniquity but we can offer rocks of refuge where righteousness reigns. Lin Stone

***

I did not follow the road I meant to, but this is where I wanted to end up.

***

Why is it people can't be satisfied with what a land wants to produce?  Give a man a prairie and he's determined to raise trees.  Give a man desert and he wants to raise rice.  Give a man a forest and his first natural inclination is to burn it down to make fields of grain. Then they wonder why the weather man can't predict what the weather will do tomorrow.

***

Lawyers get paid to tell you what the law means.  For just a dollar more politicians can tell you how to get paid for being wrong.

***

Help stop global warming; shoot a burper!

**

Don't tell me behind his back how wrong he is when you can't even convince him.

***

It is impossible to argue with anyone
who isn't neurotic, or wrong.

***

Do you think all those preservatives in processed food are what is keeping us alive?

***

Lean not unto your own understanding,
but trust it before you do some expert's.

***

One of the greatest people gifts we need is
the ability to look up to the people below us.

***

Kids can't get past the age
where they know everything
and hate everybody.

***

In this enlightened day and age of political correctness, only a few psychiatrists have wised up enough to the fraud in their text books to be ashamed of Sigmund Freud. Doktor Freud has left behind some monumentally incriminating scientific quotes that he excavated from his private psychiatric examinations though. On a scale running from one to ten I have arranged his best efforts according to the discernible degree of latent intelligence that might be hidden in his statements.

  1. I cannot put up with being stared at. Sigmund Freud
  2. The aim of all life is death. Sigmund Freud.
  3. America is a mistake, a giant mistake. Sigmund Freud
     
  4. From error to error one discovers the entire truth. Sigmund Freud
     
  5. The more the fruits of knowledge become accessible to men, the more widespread is the decline of religious belief. Sigmund Freud
     
  6. We are certainly getting ahead; if I am Moses, then you are Joshua and will take possession of the promised land of psychiatry, which I shall only be able to glimpse from afar. Sigmund Freud
  7. Anatomy is destiny. Sigmund Freud
     
  8. Everywhere I go I find a poet has been there before me. Sigmund Freud
     
  9. The goal of all life is death. Sigmund Freud Yes, I know this is the second mention of this statement, but he said it twice and this time he had been studying Darwin's Theory of Evolution -- and he meant it.
     
  10. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Attributed, probably falsely, to Sigmund Freud.  Personally, I can't believe he ever got to be that smart.
  11. ***

    If you beat a dead horse long enough you won't have to bury it.

    ==

    Talk is cheap, but hugs are precious.

    ***

    The greatest honor a man can earn on earth is to learn a lot from a child he only had time to teach a little!

    ***

    Humor is Funny Medicine.

    *

    I never pay for anything twice unless I never paid for it the first time.

    **

    Life has dragged me through a thousand mud holes because I kept hanging onto a bumper sticker.

    ***

    Retirement is that era of life when you start counting pills four times a day instead of counting sheep once a night.

    **

    If it wasn't for planning ahead I'd never know what I did yesterday.

    ***

    Self-deception is problem number one for American voters

    ***

    My cane has 4 tips for more traction so we have christened it "Mock-4"

    **

    If this depression gets any worse I may have to start living within my means.

    *

    Quitters claim they are worn out when they sit down.  Actually they are just begging for sympathy.

    **

    Giving credit where credit is due is only a good idea if you have credit.

    **

    Christmas cards are for kids that don't want to call home.

 

*

These requotes are available for your use in your articles, stories and books.  When you do use one of the quotes please attribute the source to Lin Stone.  There are several ways to do this. 
  1. As Lin Stone says (or -- As Lin Stone once said) xxx
  2. xxx -- by Lin Stone
  3. One time Lin Stone told me that xxx

Let's say you want to advertise a solution to rising medical costs.  You could do it like this, FIRST, the quote that leads into the need for your service, then the pitch.  Here we go with an actual example..

As Lin Stone once told me:

You can rip off
some of the people Most of the time.
But sooner or later
All of the People will insist on
letting someone else do it to them.

However, if you can create a link back to this page you'll make it easier for your readers AND it will be appreciated by the author.  That's killing two birds with one Stone -- and you can quote him on that..

*-*

All of us learn new subjects in a different manner.  Consequently, you may have some questions as you study this page.  Please write them down as you read down the page.  If I haven't answered these questions, when you get to the bottom of the page, YOU can write to me, or call me on the phone. it's your choice.  At this point I just want you to know that some real, live help is available for you.

No advice on this page
should be used without first publicly admitting
that what I'm saying here does make sense. 

 
Lin Stone

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