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1913-2011
Do not copy, edit, paraphrase, download, haul off, or duplicate in any way
unless your two lawyers cost more to retain than my two lawyers.
Only one man in a hundred is a leader of men.
The other 999 are trying their best
to
catch up with some woman.
Don't just keep the Faith |
The Hardest Part |
| The only thing worse than being criticised is finding out nobody cared how many mistakes you made. | In every marriage |
Even when I joke |
The trouble with this world |
C O M P R O M I S E |
People who won't work |
The trouble with this world |
It is IMPOSSIBLE |
You can rip off
some of the people Most of the time.
But sooner or later
All of the People will insist on
letting someone else do it to them.
.
A Sample of Some Published,
|
A wise man
Never Tries to Pretend
He is any smarter
Than I think he is.
| When I was acting as bodyguard one time the guy I was with left me in the
pickup to guard the money we still had, the gold in the jewel case, and the merchandise in
the back we'd already bought from other stops. We must have had over $20,000 all told and were in a neighborhood where petty theft, burglary and robbery were the predominant means of support. As more and more eyes slid my way to evaluate my cargo I decided that I'd better devote my attention to looking bad. It wasn't that hard. After all, I am 6'2" and I weighed 240. I won my first knife fight at age 11 and had been shot at a few times before then. Mickey Spillane came on strong. I scowled at everyone. I was bad. "Don't even think about coming over this way." Mickey never could have done it so good. Then this tall dude approached us from down the street. His angry eye studied every man in sight. Then he ignored everybody there and headed right for me. I scowled fiercely. He noted it, and kept right on coming. Anger burned its way right up to the top of my eyebrows. I was ready to blister every hair off his head. He stopped beside my door, staring right at me. I cranked the window down about four inches, just low enough to let him know I wasn't afraid of him, and still high enough to get the message across I didn't want any trouble either. "I'm hungry," he said. "Can you spare a dollar or two for me to get something to eat?" I studied him for a moment and having been homeless myself for eight long years, I realized he really was hungry. I reached into my own pocket to bring out 3 one dollar bills. "Thanks," I said as I handed them to him. "You're welcome," He nodded, and walked back the way he'd come from, right past the big liquor store and into the big bakery that specialized in day old bread. People were watching me. I tried to scowl to show how bad I was. But it didn't work; out of everybody on the street that man had unerringly picked me out as the nicest guy there. |
The answer to all my short prayers
seems to be a long list of things to do for someone else!
I will always have the courage to check my convictions,
and if I don't have any,
to believe the subject isn't that important.
Once you get used to a certain level of pain
anything less is pleasure.
The wish to be somebody is more persistent than the burning need to become somebody.
Get on your knees to ask the Lord for Guidance,
Then work like the devil was right on your heels.
| You can take my advice with complete confidence because my only desire is to straighten you out. | If you really have to ask, you really don't want to know. | Buddy, that's a hot potato, no matter how you mash it. |
Have you enjoyed this article?
You'll chuckle over these other tidbits as well.
Camp Cody in New Mexico
It all started in
GOOD OLD CAMP CODY
An audio generated from material original to Josh Lee
Narrated by Lin Stone
The first thing you have to do before burning
anything
in
your wood fireplace is to check whether
the thermostat is turned down.
|
Hooch The story of a boy and his dog, and the tigers that loved them to death. One Liners, the most popular brand of humor in America. Secrets of Success, according to Lucy Goosey Sound of Music Stories Why Julie Andrews decided to take the part. Doktor Freud had some important things to say. Bloopers First Class, MisPrince from Advertising Imitation Psychiatrists The atmosphere inside is sincere, earthy, and courteous. Our help is so effective that sometimes we even lull each other to sleep. After years of dedicated practice we can speak soothing, meaningless drivel on a variety of subjects. *** One unforgettable Sunday our church had a three-year- old
preacher, an organist who could only play one song, an altercation involving
the offering and a visiting beagle who knocked over the pulpit. It happened
this way on . . One Unforgettable Sunday.
*** Will Rogers Cuts Loose On The Armistice ** Are you sick and tired of being broke?
Maybe it is time to take this three part course in robbing banks. |
Frankie and Johnny
were sweethearts, even if Johnny was so crazy with jealousy that --
Masters of Disguise tales from
Hollywood. The Couch Potato's Credible Comeback
The Tinted Venus What do you do when Venus comes to life and will love no one, only you? Our young hairdresser wishes to run for his life. This is a complete, full sized book. Please RIGHT CLICK on the title to download your copy to your desktop. The Mad Dog, and danged if he didn't bite. The Book of Huckleberry Finn. The story of an uncivilized boy that took a runaway slave down the river. |
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